Dagobert's Revenge

Lady Cadaver

Once, Twice, Three Times a Lady

Interview by Count Backwards

Fresh from the morgue, a new corpus delicti has just been identified: a group of young necrophiles from Cambridge, England. Although barely out of High School and barely old enough to drink the devil’s nectar, they’re already busy producing quality morbid rock musick - fun musick that makes you feel like a kid again: a sad, lonely, self-obsessed, melancholy kid with mascara dripping down your sour-looking face, your hair so encrusted with mousse that it’s starting to attract vermin, spikes on your leather jacket that could put someone’s eye out, red marks on your wrist from your last suicide attempt, and red marks on your ankles because you can’t stop accidentally kicking yourself with those cumbersome, butt-ugly Doc Martins you insist on wearing. And who wouldn’t want to relive such precious memories? Well, for Lady Cadaver, they’re not just memories. They’re actually living the dream. Here we have a few words with their lead singer, the 18-year old Caleb.

DR: I hear you’re 18 years old. When did you start playing music? What kind of musical education did you get?

Caleb: Well, my dad used to be in Pink Floyd playing the drums and I just wanted to learn, so I did. I only did GCSE music at school but I have had some singing lessons.

DR: How and when did Lady Cadaver get started?

Caleb: 1997, in a bus-stop. Me and Chris had just quit our old bands and we were bored.

DR: What clubs do you guys play at? Have you gone on tour yet?

Caleb: We mostly play at old peoples' homes......no, sorry I lied! Um, oh, yes we play in lots of different pubs and stuff. No, we haven't gone on tour yet but probably in the summer.

DR: Where did you learn how to scream like a girl?

Caleb: When I was fucking my little sister.....um.....no, sorry I lied again.

DR: Is the song “Brandon Lee Wannabe” an autobiography?

Caleb: FUCK OFF, NO !!! B.L.W. is about this guy who we hate and he just wants to be Brandon Lee.

DR: How about “Gassed”? Is that about the Holocaust?

Caleb: No, it's about Chris getting chucked out of school for putting some sort of gas in the air conditioning.

DR: It is said that Kierkkegaard couldn’t write unless he had an apple rotting in his desk drawer. Are you similarly inspired by rotting corpses?

Caleb: Well no, sorry to let you down.....um......I like.....um......sex.

DR: Have you ever seen a dead body before?

Caleb: No, sorry. I'm not that scary, I'm quite nice.

DR: Have you ever seen the movie “Re-Animator”?

Caleb: No, but Chris says it's crap.

DR: What do you think of the French?

Caleb: Um, well, there just too Goddamn French for me.

DR: Ever had an allergic reaction to eye make-up?

Caleb: No, but I have an allergic reaction to the French.

DR: Is Agent Scully attractive to you?

Caleb: Um....only sometimes.

DR: Are you offended by the term “limey”?

Caleb: No, I think it's great because my girlfriend's American and she calls me a limey and it's cool because it's a bit like slimy. (I don't know, I'm a bit mad.....Moooooo.)

Lady Cadaver have a new album out called “Rot.” To obtain it, contact them at:
16 Grasmere Gardens
Cambridge, Cambridgeshire, CB4 3DR

or email them at: ladycadaver@fertileearth.clara.net.

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